I want to break the record of having more than one wife.

(Read that again).

All my life getting married to two or more beautiful wives is my dream.

Time without numbers I fantasize it. And I would ask myself: How would I make this dream come true?

I decided the only way is to start putting it into practice. So any woman I met I would tell them, "Look, I think I want to marry more than one wife."

And as you already guessed, the relationship always ended faster than Usain Bolt could ever run a hundred metre race.

But I wasn't giving up anytime soon. And for God so interested in my dream He blessed me with (let's say) Janet and Iyabo. 

(This is not fiction so I don't want to mention their real names).

I was disturbing Iyabo first. But she was busy chasing a guy that ended up not giving too much damn about her (she found out later).

For about six months I kept on telling her I want her. But I was an a*s-face too, because I still have some girls that want my dïck down there in their vägïnä. So basically her 'No!' wasn't that important.

But I kept on telling her I love her. And yes I didn't know why. Maybe because I am promiscuous. Just maybe.

Fast forward some months she started sluggishly coming around (we work almost at the same place at that time). But a week or two before she was showing green signs I met Janet and right from the night I met her her green light was deeming brightly.

So without wasting time I already decided Janet is the way. 

But this stupid idea of wanting to marry more than one wife wouldn't leave me. 

And because of that I didn't cut Iyabo off when she started behaving like she's now interested.

I talked to them both (separately) that I love them and I couldn't chose between them and I would rather marry the two of them.

There was silence for one week. I already predicted it. I stayed calm and didn't rush in calling any of them.

Janet came around first and said I should've told her the first day we met. But it's okay, she already chosen to be with me before she said yes and another person wouldn't stop her from loving me.

Iyabo took time to accept. With her pride and sense of superiority she stylishly keep on telling me to cut Janet off.

"Not going to be possible," I would say. "You caused all this, didn't you? You kept on chasing a guy who gave zero fucks about you only to think about me after you got dump behind. You think I'm an idîot?"

She would shut up after that. But gradually I started pitying her.

Because no matter what I said she will kneels down and told me she was sorry.

I wasn't a robot. Even though I am a long distance jogger it does not mean I am not emotional.

I will ended up hugging her but I knew it was too late. I couldn't broke up with any of them except they chose to walk away on their own.

My God! Olorun mi! Emi ma dupe (I thank you oo).

Janet supported her with all her heart.

But family members turned Iyabo upsidedown to me.

They gave her all kinds of advice. And one day she told me to choose one between Janet and her.

I disagree. I already knew she wasn't the one talking. It was what friends and family told her she was acting on.

Eventually she said she will abort the pregnancy.

And to God who made me I didn't know how she did it. She just said she fell sick and BOOM! No more pregnancy anywhere.

I wasn't the type who got angry easily or shout around.

I told her no way, that she must find the pregnancy wherever she kept it. Then I stopped talking to her.

Janet said I have to bring her back. Because now she is pregnant too. And she can't be happy without seeing Iyabo.

I disagree with Janet to bring Iyabo back and Janet also get rid of her pregnancy.

Ground zero.

I am back to ground zero.

But I learned another lesson: Being honest everytime will cost you more than good things.

The above story was part of the reasons I couldn't stop being a long distance jogger.

Because through running I could keep my thoughts in my head without going crazy.

And yeah, I drink Fearless energy drink too. Mixed with a little bit of alcohol.

But I don't want you to advice me. Not at all.

Because that same dream I am still going to achieve it (so far I am still alive).

I will break the record of marrying more than one wife and the wives are not fighting each other.

So if you have a silly dream too. Maybe you should go chase it.

PS: I found true happiness in being honest to myself. So if you're interested, I can be your personal coach for 12 months (1 year). Talk to me in the comment section.