In Lagos, another driver hitting your car is a canon event and it’s bound to happen at some point. When it does, don’t panic, just follow these simple steps: 

Step 1: Activate your inner werey

Every Lagosian has one, even the soft-spoken ones. You don’t need to shout like a conductor or threaten anyone. you just have to get a little crazy in this situation. 

Step 2: Inspect the damage

Both of you will come down and check the car like seasoned mechanics. The other driver will usually choose one personality:

 • The beggar: apologising, shaking, explaining the story of their life from 1998 till now.

 • The lawyer: blaming you, the road, the sun, and everything else but themselves. 

 • The adult: calling a mechanic and asking how much it’ll cost.

Their behaviour decides how much werey you activate.

Step 3: Gather evidence before people start to gather

Before spectators start giving free advice, snap your photos and videos.

Capture:

 • The damage

 • Both number plates

 • The road situation

Your phone remembers better than eyewitnesses in traffic.

Step 4: Talk money early

Move the conversation straight to repairs.

Ask how they want to handle payment. Transfers are best. Avoid promises like “I’ll call you later.” Later rarely comes in Lagos.

Step 5: If the person is doing shakara

This is where your werey comes in.

Raise your voice slightly. Stand your ground. Speak with confidence even if your heart is racing.

Statements like:

 • “We’re not leaving here today”

 • “Call LASTMA, I don’t have a problem”

 • “We’ll go to the police station, it’s fine”

You don’t actually want police stress, but sometimes the threat alone restores sense.

Step 6: Know when to choose peace

If the damage is small and traffic is turning feral, take what you can and move. Sometimes your sanity is more expensive than a scratch.

Save this. You’ll need it someday.